TAKEAWAYS FROM 2015. Real Talk.
Happy LAST thursDAY of 2015! I'm overwhelmed and flooded with mixed emotions but also very much at peace. I would compare 2015 to a growing pain. I've grown a lot this year, but geeeez...it was painful sometimes. Frankly speaking, I spent the majority of this year entirely focused on the future. I did "live in the moment", but I also was constantly worried about the next step in line. I'm looking back at how I lived 2015 and really what resonates more than anything is the juxtaposition of doubt and hope that pushed me and webbed everything in my life.picture from this post |
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I keep repeating these questions to myself. How can I become a person with a generosity of spirit and depth of character? How can I be connected to the deepest meanings of life and my highest moral joys? Those are tough questions, but they are truly essential to who I want to be and what I want to do in the future. I have no idea what the future will look like because everything always turns out so magically different from what I imagine...but man, there are going to be awesome adventures and stories ahead.
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Happy 2016!
Hi everyone! Diana here. I don't write often on this blog, obviously, as photographing and editing photos take quite the amount of time. But when I do write, I'm generally very excited to do so.
Not so much this time.
I've read five 2015 reflection posts already yesterday and today combined, and what marvels me the most is how people condense a year into paragraphs. Because I don't know how to. And I'm not sure I want to.
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picture from this post; a time spent teaching that I will forever remember, in contrast to the months I spent buried in books and computers |
I guess if I had to say what I learned this year--after all, is that not what these posts are for?--it's that I'm tired. I'm tired of the injustice that burns in this world, I'm tired of how ceaseless work can drive you insane, I'm tired because there comes a point in your life when you must ask yourself why, and though it's perfectly fine to not know the answer, when I know the answer, and I know what I've spent so long doing is not really achieving much for that answer, that is tiring.
So I only have one goal for myself: do.
picture from this post; the ocean is always an inspiration: the water pushes on, even when the sun is gone--especially when the sun is gone |
Not just do for academics. I know how to do that. I've spent so long doing that. But do dream, do create, do find power in disillusionment. Because even though I'm disillusioned--I learn so I can help, but so much of what I spend so long learning, I cannot use to help, because I'm trapped in a system that forces me to keep churning away at the same textbooks when all I want to do is get out there and do something with what I know, and all the service I am doing right now is not enough, I can do more so I will do more--I can use that to light a fire beneath my feet.
Because in 2016, I'm rocketing.
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